ACE OF CLUBS: TONA ZEHM
"Life takes us strange places."
Captain in the US Army Reserve, Wisconsin State Assembly representative from the 101st District, and single mother, Tona is used to wearing lots of different hats and shirts and various other garments. In this slightly out-of-date illustration from 2016, Tona wields her signature weapon: a ruthless and (nearly) naked positive mental attitude.
Strengths: Determination, sleeps <3 hours a day
Weaknesses: Hot tempered, totally not sexually repressed
JACK OF DIAMONDS: SAM CHRISTIANOS
"You should have known better than to mess with a Doctor of Journalism!"
University of Wisconsin-Madison Norma Jeane Mortenson Professor of Women in Media, two time New York Times bestselling non-fiction author, and executive producer on the smash hit documentary Burn Atlanta 2 The Ground, Sam Christianos has been getting lucky breaks since before he was born.
Strengths: Compassionate, well read
Weaknesses: Indecisive when in danger, promiscuous
KING OF HEARTS: ERIC MACDONALD
"I am a good man."
Father of Trinity, Tona's child.
Strengths: Exceptional mechanical dexterity, unparalleled failure mode analysis skills in multiple disciplines, practical demolitions experience, nearly impossible to kill
Weaknesses: "Batshit crazy" and currently missing